Page 4409 – Christianity Today (2024)

TEMPTATION

Over the years, LEADERSHIP has earned a reputation for addressing ministry issues realistically and redemptively. Occasionally that means tackling a taboo.

Seventeen years ago we published “The War Within,” an anonymous minister’s battle with lust and voyeurism. With its realistic depiction of sexual temptation, it quickly became one of our most controversial—and most requested—articles.

Nearly two decades later, sexual temptations in various forms continue to plague those in ministry. The following is one pastor’s lengthy struggle to overcome hom*osexual thoughts and desires. Like “The War Within,” this is a straightforward account of a sensitive subject, but we believe its publication could be a first step in helping other Christian leaders who are privately facing a similar struggle.

Some days the urge to fantasize wasn’t so bad. I’d be engrossedin my work, and the thoughts wouldn’t even enter my head. Those werethe times that I loved being a pastor. I relished the privilege of reachingout to others and sensed that God used me to touch hurting lives.

But other days it took all I had to stay focused on ministry. The feelingswould creep into my mind, stirred up by a muscular physique on the streetor a handsome face in a restaurant. I’d pray and try to quash the thoughtsright there, but often they grew too great, too pleasurable. Those were thetimes I hated being a pastor. I despised the lie I was living.

My life and ministry were a tangled mess. On the surface I was a respectedchurch leader, married to a beautiful woman, with a wonderful family. Inside,I was an entirely different person, consumed by hom*osexual desires.

Sunday mornings were particularly distressing. How does a so-called man ofGod enter the pulpit and preach with integrity and conviction about becominga new creation when his own life feels so stained and hopeless? Often I wouldgaze over the congregation and think, If only you people knew what I wasreally like, what I struggle with every day, the kinds of thoughts I entertainedthis week …

One day I drove to a distant town to meet with a group of fellow pastorsin my denomination. We sat in a conference room discussing areas in our regionthat would be ideal for new church plants. But as we talked demographicsand strategies, I fought to block out recurring images of p*rnography, imagesthat had been etched into my mind from repeated viewings of sexually explicitmovies and photos.

On the way home, I took an exit ramp, consulted the Yellow Pages, and withinminutes was in an adult video store, perusing the video jackets and glossymagazines, searching for a picture of the perfect man.

Not like the other guysI was raised in a working-class, Christian family. God made it clear thatministry was his path for my life early on. It was not always a welcomedcall. I feared it, fought it, pushed it aside. Yet I couldn’t shakeit.

Nothing gave me more peace and fulfillment than helping other people andconnecting them with their Creator. I was very involved in my youth group,a regular volunteer for mission trips, a tireless camp counselor during thesummers. Ministry was my joy—the one thing that made me feel whole.

Ironically, my call to ministry coincided with the emergence of my hom*osexualstruggle. As a young boy, I had a great curiosity about the male body. I’mnot sure why. Maybe it was because my father, who worked two jobs, was notaround much. When he was present, he was neither affirming nor affectionate.I was convinced he didn’t love me, and I felt I was a disappointmentto him.

As a teenager, I concluded I was different. While I felt some attractionto girls, I was much more attracted to members of my own sex. As I maturedphysically, those attractions became stronger. I knew, however, that to tellanyone would be a tragic mistake.

When my parents spoke of hom*osexuals, they used words like “perverted” and“disgusting.”

I read in the newspaper one day a letter written to Ann Landers from someonewho was struggling with hom*osexual feelings. That same evening, Mom referredto the piece. She called the man a “hom*o” and said people like that weresick in the head. Her words stung. If only she knew that his struggle washer son’s as well.

In high school, there were jokes about “fa*gs” and “queers.” Trying to beone of the guys, I laughed. But within, I ached. I was confused. Why wasI attracted to guys? Was I a woman stuck in a man’s body? Was Inature’s mistake?

Many times I went to my room and cried out to God, sometimes in anger, sometimesout of overwhelming helplessness. I pleaded with God to change me. But nomatter how passionate my plea, no matter how intense my prayers, I did notchange. My same-sex desires did not go away. In my mind, God remained silent.

I found relief through fantasy and masturbation. Though I never had a sexualencounter with another male, I fed my cravings with erotic images from magazines.By the time I graduated from high school, I had been exposed to a relativelysmall amount of p*rnography, but my fantasy life was out of control. It wasmy way of dealing with the loneliness. It gave me an escape, a rush, untilthe next wave of shame washed over me.

College opened a whole new world of lust and sexual obsession. I was nowan adult in a different city. I could get lost. I attended a Christian collegebut had more freedom than I’d ever known before. Within a few months,I discovered hard-core p*rnography.

I cried out to God, sometimes in anger, sometimes out of overwhelming helplessness. I pleaded with God to change me.

I continued to fill my mind with new images of men I saw in magazines orviewing booths. But the relief was always temporary. Each time I felt a littlemore miserable. My shame increased, as well as feelings of inferiority. Itwas hard to concentrate on schoolwork. Most of the time, life was hell.

First confessionMidway through college, I gathered the courage to share my pain with a closefriend. We had hit it off well from the beginning. I considered him godly,spiritual, and caring. I respected him for his confidence and what seemedlike wisdom beyond his years. I thought it would be safe to tell him my secret.

By this time, the anguish of being an observer in life instead of a participantwas more than I could bear. The guys in my dormitory were dating, pursuingdreams, and thinking about their futures. Some were planning to get engaged.I, however, was paralyzed by fear and shame.

The night I decided to share my secret, my friend and I were away at a retreat.It was close to midnight as we lay in our room talking about school and life.The room was dark. He was on the top bunk. I lay on the one beneath. Theyears of pain and rejection were churning inside me. My body was shaking.I wanted to share my secret, but the words wouldn’t come. How do youtell someone you’re a hom*osexual? Would he reject me? Would he tellothers?

I lay silent, searching for words, any words, other than the “H” word. Therewere none.

Finally I said, “You know how guys are supposed to be attracted to girls?Well, I’m attracted to … ” I fell silent in fear, but he already knew.

“Guys?” he said.

“Yeah,” I answered after a long pause. Suddenly, my secret was out. For thefirst time, my soul lay naked before another person.

I don’t remember my roommate’s words that evening, but I rememberhis kindness. How he prayed for me and accepted me. He gave me a tiny glimpseof what God’s grace and acceptance might be like.

It was a healing moment, but within the next few weeks our friendshipdeteriorated. I leaned on him too much. I looked to him to help me, to encourageme, to fix me. In the end, my neediness drove him away. Wisely, he encouragedme to see a counselor, which I did. But the counseling was short-term anddidn’t do a lot to help me.

A tough callingDespite my feelings of doubt and inadequacy, I continued my journey towardfull-time ministry. I went to seminary hoping that somehow I would find thehealing I desperately longed for.

Some might argue I shouldn’t have pursued ministry in the first place,that my struggle with hom*osexuality disqualified me from effective service,and, to some extent, I can appreciate those objections. But then I wonderif those objectors have ever experienced a call from God; the way hesupernaturally woos, empowers, and blesses one into his service.

In unmistakable ways—through conversations, encouragement from others, andeffectiveness in the ministries I undertook—I knew that becoming a pastorwas my destiny. It wasn’t an easy process.

At times I agonized, wondering if I was sanctified enough for this calling.But God continued opening doors to ministry, and, however crippled from myinner battle, I walked through them.

Through most of my seminary career, I managed to resist the urge to pickup p*rnography. After one instance of giving in to the temptation, I confessedto my pastor. A thoughtful and understanding man, he referred me to a counselorwho encouraged me to start dating women. I took his advice to heart. It wasa move that would change my life forever.

Trying the knotI soon began seeing a special young woman from my church. Laura (not herreal name) was a gentle and caring person, who was always willing to listento my complaints about Greek exams or 30-page theology papers. We made eachother laugh and, in time, became very close.

Still, I didn’t see any reason to tell her my secret. I knew that ifour relationship continued to progress, I eventually would have to tell her.But I decided to wait. Perhaps I would find freedom from my struggle beforeI’d need to reveal it to her.

One evening I succumbed to temptation and visited a liquor store that soldmale p*rnography. This time, though, the guilt was too much for me. I knewLaura saw our relationship as one with long-term potential. The right thingto do, I finally decided, was to stop deceiving her and ‘fess up. Sheneeded to know who I really was.

My confession caught her totally off guard. At first she was afraid. “Whyare you attracted to me?” she asked. “What does this mean for our relationship?”

I couldn’t answer her. I encouraged her to talk to our pastor, who wasfamiliar with my situation. They met the following week. He distinguishedfor her the difference between the condition of hom*osexuality and the actualsin of acting upon one’s desires. Because I was not acting upon my impulsesand only struggled with desires, he believed it was safe to continue withthe relationship.

The pastor’s counsel helped assuage Laura’s uneasiness, and weeventually decided to marry. I loved Laura, but I also saw marriage as animportant step towards shutting the door on my hom*osexual self and embracinga new life of public heterosexuality.

By marrying, I hoped those old lusts and desires would gradually fade—theydidn’t.

Slowly I realized that this was an awful way to enter a marriage. I bouncedfrom being a good husband to being one who was moody, angry, and depressed.The frustration that came with my inability to resist temptation was takenout on my wife. I blamed her for my problems.

In our intimate times together, I found myself succumbing to thoughts oflust toward men and feeling immense guilt afterwards. Of course, I didn’ttell her that. I knew it would hurt her deeply to discover that Ifound men more arousing than her.

Ministry tanglesFollowing seminary, I accepted a position at a small but bustling church.I was a competent preacher. Through God’s Spirit, my sermons had animpact. I often heard how God was using particular messages to changepeople’s lives. I was an effective administrator. I had a reputationfor doing things right. And I related well to the members of my congregation.

Pastoral care came easily for me. I was able to empathize with hurting souls(because of my own hurt?), and people opened up to me, often saying, “Ididn’t expect to tell you all of this.” One woman, hospitalized withsevere depression, told me when I visited her that the first Sunday she metme, she knew I understood pain.

To most people, I was perceived as having it all together, but I struggledfiercely many days just to keep my life together.

For years I remained outwardly faithful to my wife and my ministry. But inwardly,I was committing adultery on a regular basis. Only by God’s grace didI avoid crossing the line and not become involved with another man—and thenonly because the right situation never presented itself.

For a few moments, p*rnography gave me an escape, a rush, until the next wave of shame washed over me.

At times I was physically attracted to men I knew in the church. I usuallyfigured these feelings were safe because the guys were straight and therewas no potential for becoming involved. I ended one “accountability” friendshipbecause I knew the man had the same struggle as I, and the potential forboth of us to fall was there.

Again, I coped with the pain through fantasy and masturbation. p*rnographycontinued to be a constant battle. The temptation to drive by an adult bookstorewas there nearly every time I went to a meeting or made a hospital call.Though I seldom went in, it gave me a rush of adrenaline just to ride by.

The struggle was strongest when my wife was out of town. At times the strugglewas so strong that I would break out in a sweat and become physically ill.

After yielding, I usually confessed to my wife. It made me feel better; itmade her feel worse. I was too wrapped up in myself to realize what it wasdoing to her as a person, how it was chipping away at her self-esteem andsense of security. She lived in a semi-state of fear that one day someonewho knew me would walk into a place and catch me looking at p*rnography.She imagined me being thrown out of the ministry and our lives being turnedupside down.

The breaking pointAfter more than a decade of marriage, and what seemed a lifetime of emotionalturmoil, I was near the end of my rope. A moment of lustful indulgence hadled me to an adult video store on the outskirts of town.

As was my ritual, I absorbed the crude images and left the store in shameand disgust. But this time, the flood of guilt and frustration felt moreacute. It was as if God had given me a glimpse of my pathetic descent fromhis own perspective. I had to seek help, even if it meant risking that mycongregation would find out.

When I got home, I told Laura that I couldn’t keep living this way,that I was going to make an appointment with a parachurch ministry in a nearbycity that helped those who struggled with hom*osexuality. She didn’tknow what to think.

As she spoke, fear and anger crept to the surface: “If someone from churchfinds out, you won’t have a job. What would we do? How would you explainit to the kids?” She fell into a chair and began to cry. “Why can’tyou just get your act together and stop this?”

“I don’t know how to stop this,” I fired back. “I’ve tried. Ifthis church can’t handle this, then I don’t want to be a part ofthis church.”

I continued, tears flowing, “My holiness and our marriage are more importantto God than my job. And my holiness and our marriage are starting to becomemore important to me as well. I need to take the risk.”

Hope at lastThe counselor I began meeting with wanted me to attend a weekly meeting forpeople struggling with hom*osexuality. I resisted for weeks, but I knew Ineeded to go.

As I drove down the freeway to the first meeting, I was full of doubt. Insideme raged a war unlike anything I had ever experienced. This is the rightthing to do. God will take care of you, I reminded myself. But rearingits ugly head was my old nature shouting, “This is stupid ! What if you runinto someone you know? What if one of your parishioners is there?”

When I arrived, I wasn’t sure what I would find. What I discovered wasa group of men and women who looked like the same people I see at the localKmart. They looked a lot like me.

The first meeting ended with prayer for each member. We numbered off intogroups of four to share our needs and tell the others something about ourselves.To my surprise God had orchestrated the numbering so that the ministry peoplewere in the same group: a pastor’s wife, a former youth pastor, a musicdirector, and myself. I was floored.

At that moment, I knew God was there and that he was pleased I was there.I knew it was going to be okay.

For nearly two years, we learned about shame, temptation, and healing ourwounded identities. We discussed what it means to be a man or a woman, andhow to develop healthy relationships. We shared with each other our hurts,fears, and failures.

In this setting the tangled mess of my life began to unfold. I was able tolay open my bleeding soul, my unresolved pain, and find understanding, love,and acceptance from people in the same situation. More than that, I beganto receive hope that life could be different, that God could heal me.

But there were also times when I wanted to give up. Times when the healingwas too slow and painful. I had read the books, been to counseling, and gonefor months without looking at p*rnography, yet something would happen, triggeringa relapse into old habits.

One such time, I said to my counselor, “Change is not possible.”

“It’s okay to say this is extremely difficult,” he responded. “But donot say it’s impossible.”

I began to let go of the hurts from the past. I had to offer forgivenessto those who had wounded me—my emotionally distant father, my controllingmother, my insensitive peers, and dozens of others who had wounded me. Oneby one, in the presence of my kind and loving counselor, I brought them tomind, forgave them, and released my pain to God.

One day my counselor asked, “When you think of God as a father, what do youthink of?”

His question caught me off guard. Nobody had ever asked me that before (andif they had, I probably wouldn’t have answered honestly). I thoughta moment and said, “He’s distant, and he’s disappointed in me.”

“And how does the Bible describe God, the Father?” my counselor asked.

The words I had learned as a child flooded my mind: “The Lord is mercifuland gracious, slow to anger and abounding in loving kindness. He will notalways chide, neither will he keep his anger forever. Like as a father pitiethhis children so the Lord has pity on those who fear him. For he knows ourframe, he remembers we are dust. As far as the east is from the west so farhas he removed our transgressions from us.” As I finished, tears welled upin my eyes.

“It sounds to me,” my counselor continued, “like you have an accurate perceptionof who God is in your head, but not in your heart. You’re seeing yourheavenly father like you saw your earthly father. But that’s not whatGod is like.”

I knew his words were true, but they were so hard to accept. Nevertheless,a little bit of truth penetrated my heart. At that moment, I could clearlysee the path to wholeness.

Renewing mind and soulToday my wife and I are on the road to healing. For more than two decades,I feared hurt and rejection. Now, thanks to strong, Christ-centered counselingand the help of a compassionate male mentor who challenged me to make responsiblechoices and held me accountable when I didn’t, I’ve begun to findtrue freedom as a man, husband, and minister.

Part of my recovery has involved taking more risks in developing friendships.In doing so I’ve discovered how hungry I was for healthy friendshipswith other men. As I became comfortable with healthy same-sex relationships,my physical attraction to men diminished.

My relationship with my wife has changed as well. Our intimate times haveimproved significantly, as I am now able to focus on her exclusively. I havediscovered a positive sexual attraction for her that was sorely lacking inthe past.

Most important, God has revealed again and again that I need to grow in myrelationship with him. As I began spending more time memorizing and meditatingon God’s Word, I realized how many lies I had believed all my life—liesabout who I was, what gave me worth, and about God’s ability and willingnessto change me.

These revelations have not only brought healing and hope to my personal life,but they have injected new excitement into my professional ministry.

I once believed I was a hom*osexual because of my thoughts and desires. Ibelieved I was stuck in that role and that I should see myself that way.I have since come to know that God sees me in Christ as a new creation (2Cor. 5:17). I am not a hom*osexual. I am a Christian who struggles at timeswith hom*osexual thoughts that have diminished considerably. But that is justa part of who I am. It is not my identity.

I’d be lying if I said this process has been easy, or that I have arrived.It will be a lifetime journey. But God has brought change beyond my wildestdreams. And I know he isn’t finished.

The author of this article is the pastor of a church in theMidwest.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

ADMINISTRATION

They are known by a variety of names: secretary, administrative assistant, receptionist, office manager. In many ways, they occupy a church’s most strategic position—the first voice to answer the phone, the first smile to welcome a weekday guest. They create the first impression, and they are the glue that keeps a bustling staff connected and on task.

Yet churches and parachurch ministries are full of hard-working assistants who are often taken for granted or not used effectively.

Earlier this year, Willow Creek Community Church in suburban Chicago hosted a special workshop for ministry assistants. Following the event, LEADERSHIP associate editor Edward Gilbreath spoke to the workshop leaders about how pastors and their assistants can maximize their ministry.

Jean Blount has been executive assistant to Willow Creek senior pastor Bill Hybels for nine years.

Cathy Burnett is entering her fourth year as executive assistant to Jim Mellado, president of the Willow Creek Association (which has a membership of 4,300 churches worldwide).

Jodi Walle has been executive assistant to Willow Creek’s teaching pastors John Ortberg and Lee Strobel for five years.

How do you define the role of ministry assistant?

JODI WALLE: There is no easy definition. Sometimes she handles confidential materials, sometimes she makes coffee. She answers the phone and may get one of a hundred different tragic stories on the other end of the line. She may comfort a grieving widow, consult with a possible donor, or welcome a new member. She helps prepare the annual budget, reminds you to keep receipts, and keeps everyone on time for meetings. She reminds you when it’s Sweetest Day and helps wrap your spouse’s birthday present. She is the only contact some people ever have with a church; they decide after one conversation with her whether or not to even bother showing up for a service.

CATHY BURNETT: It is a critical position, because it extends the ministry of the leader. We represent the church as well as the church leader.

JEAN BLOUNT: Assistants manage the millions of details that flow through a church office, and we make a busy pastor seem accessible. My mission statement as Bill’s assistant is “To blend my gifts with those of the pastor to form a partnership that enables both of us to do our most effective ministry.”

So, are you considered “support staff” or “ministry staff”?

WALLE: I think that’s an unfair differentiation. No church assistant is doing her job for the money, the hours, or the glamour. We are as called to this job as any other Christian minister.

Does having your pastor as a boss present any hindrances to your personal growth or spiritual life?

BLOUNT: Some assistants find it very difficult to work and worship at the same place. There is an inevitable lack of separation between the professional and personal sides of a church worker’s life, especially in smaller churches. However, I don’t believe having your boss as a pastor should be a problem, as long as you show mutual respect for each other and for one another’s boundaries. For instance, some assistants may not feel comfortable carrying their jobs beyond the parameters of the office because that area of their lives is personal and off-limits.

She is the only contact some people ever have with a church; they decide after oneconversation with herwhether or not to even bother showing up for a service.

—Jodi Walle

WALLE: Pastors can help their assistants by protecting their time. If the assistant doesn’t work on Sundays but is constantly bombarded by those who need keys to the church office, copies made, and so on, then the assistant isn’t allowed to come and simply worship.

BURNETT: One way to do this would be to set a rotating schedule, so that the assistant isn’t “on duty” every Sunday.

Is it ever difficult for you to listen to your “pastor” because of a conflict with your “boss”?

WALLE: Only once in five years has it been hard for me to attend a service because of conflict with the pastor. I always try to resolve work-related conflicts as soon as possible. I don’t know why any church worker would stay at a job where there is constant unresolved conflict with their pastor. I frankly wouldn’t be able to sit under the teaching of anyone who would allow unresolved conflict to continue.

BURNETT: No matter how wonderful church leaders are, sometimes they can get under their assistant’s skin. At Willow Creek, we uphold the value of conflict resolution as laid out in Matthew 18:15. It’s also important to have a safe group of people that will hold you accountable to honoring the resolution process. It may be a network of other assistants or close friends who attend another church, people we can trust to keep our discussions confidential. I try not to go to my husband or family to complain, because I want to protect the credibility and the reputation of my boss, and I need for them to respect their church leaders. But it’s important to have a safe place to unload.

What can a leader do to make the assistant most effective?

WALLE: Communication is crucial—clearly communicating expectations, informing the assistant of where they are at all times, and allowing the assistant to do her work without interference.Interference is not to be confused with interruptions, which are just a normal part of the job. Interference refers to those who don’t let the assistants do the job set before them. The pastor may feel the need to control each step the assistant takes, and that won’t be productive for anyone. If you constantly interfere in the assistant’s assignments, you send a signal that you don’t think he or she is capable of handling it.

What’s the weirdest thing that you’ve had to do as an assistant?

BLOUNT: I get lots of interesting requests, because Bill knows I like a challenge. But my most unusual request was when Bill asked me to find a book he had glimpsed at an airport bookstore. All he knew was that it had a green cover with a picture of a sailboat on it. He didn’t know the title, the author, or if it was fiction or nonfiction—but he wanted the book. I browsed through several bookstores, looking in categories where I thought I might find it. Finally, one day I was at the mall with my husband and decided to check that bookstore again. I walked over to the mystery section, and the first book I turned over was green with a sailboat. It was the book!

WALLE: I had to buy a bowling ball at 10 o’clock one night so my boss could use it as a trophy at an event the next morning.

BURNETT: At a previous job, I had to answer each incoming call with “Hello, did you see our God-honoring Easter pageant yesterday?”

How should a leader handle a situation where his assistant really isn’t working out?

BURNETT: If the leader is consistently communicating his expectations and areas of concern, then it won’t be a surprise to the assistant if a change has to be made.

WALLE: There should be clear communication about the reasons it is “not working out.” If the assistant needs to improve in some areas, it would be prudent to explain the needs and outline a set amount of time for the improvement to occur. There should be a review after the set time has elapsed, with the understanding that if things haven’t been resolved, the assistant may be let go at that time.

I think churches often allow people to stay in positions that they aren’t suited for, rather than do the uncomfortable or unpopular thing. In the long run, everyone loses. The church loses by having someone poorly representing it. The assistant loses by staying in what may be the wrong job. And the pastor loses, because he can’t work up to his fullest capacity if he isn’t being properly supported.

What kinds of questions should leaders be asking their assistants on a regular basis?

BURNETT: How are you doing? How am I doing as a boss? Am I doing anything that frustrates you in your job?

BLOUNT: Do you have what you need from me to do your work? Can I do anything to facilitate our work relationship?

WALLE: Are you satisfied in your job? What is one thing you wish you could change about it? How can I pray for you?

Encouragement and open communication seem to be the common theme.

BLOUNT: Absolutely. Leaders should find ways to let their assistants know they are valued and appreciated.

In a good pastor-assistant relationship, both individuals want the best for each other. The assistant does all she can to make the pastor look good and do his best, and the pastor always is willing to give the assistant credit for her part in the ministry and help her to grow—even if it means that she may one day move on to another position.

WALLE: Assistants work for God, but they work for Godwith their bosses. It’s a team effort.

ARTICLE IN A GLANCE

Five Marks of a healthy Pastor-Assistant Team:

1. They communicate. The leader gives clear instructions and honest feedback; the assistant feels free to offer opinions and suggestions.

2. They challenge each other. The leader gives assignments that he knows will interest and stretch his assistant; the assistant keeps the leader aware of schedules and responsibilities.

3. They cooperate. The leader trusts the assistant with key information; the assistant sometimes goes beyond the call of the job description (e.g., picking up sandwiches before an evening meeting).

4. They confront conflict. Both parties are committed to resolving disagreements or misunderstandings before they fester.

5. They celebrate. The leader regularly affirms the assistant and lets others know her value; the assistant encourages the leader and strives to make the office a pleasant environment.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

Out behind thesanctuary on the grounds of most churches in the snowy north there used tobe a long shed. Covered on the top and three sides, it was usually open onthe south side. That’s where church attenders stowed their horses andbuggies during the service.

They started tearing down the sheds around 1915. I’ve read a lot ofchurch histories, and many report how the space was needed for automobiles.I remember as a child seeing a few of the sheds used for storage, but therecords say by the mid 1920s most were demolished.

The horse shed gave way to the parking lot. But those same histories don’treport the paving of the lots until the 1950s. You can imagine during theintervening 30 years the rainy Sundays when the old horse lot was a muddymess.

In our time, a lot of walls have come down. And we don’t yet know whatto do with the space that has been created. And if the sheds are any lesson,it will be some time before we know what, if anything, will replace them.

One nation, individualThe Berlin Wall was demolished in 1989, and eventually a divided nation wasstitched together. The new Germany has made much progress, but reunificationis an ongoing process. The new nation is not like either the formerwestern-oriented republic or the eastern-dominated state. Germany today isa very different and evolving entity.

In our time many walls are falling, and the effects are felt in the church.Trade agreements are making allies of enemies. Travelers can cross the bordersof some European Union countries without visas. Several nations, Germanyamong them, are debating sanctioning dual citizenship. Israel already hasit. More and more we see ourselves as citizens of the world.

Racial barriers are down, and interracial marriages are on the rise. Wallsaround ideologies are dropping, and people move easily between faiths anddenominations. Migration of second, third, and fourth, generation Catholicsinto Protestant churches is increasing. So is the departure of ProtestantChristians to non-Christian faiths. Institutional loyalty is dead.

Rising from the debris of our lost values is the new value on the individual.The “me” generation has given way to a “me” world. The question is, how willthe church, the ultimate “we” organization, adjust?

United, risingPart of this individualism is classic adolescent rebellion. When we askedthe young lady who became our daughter-in-law what she liked about our son,she replied, “He’s opposed to most of the things my father favors.”

Likewise, a nation of individuals has arisen from rejection of the thingsthat united the generations who endured the depression and world wars:appreciation for conformity, commitment to a cause, and sacrifice for thegreater good.

We once built community, especially in the first half of the twentieth century,through the sense of belonging. Clubs once popular—Lions, Kiwanis, Rotary—arestruggling because of decline in institutional loyalty. Even Sunday school,which operates in some sense on the club model, is in trouble.

So, how do you build community?

You use some means other than conformity to promote community. The easiestway to consolidate a group is to give them a new common enemy. A morescripturally sound way is to develop shared experiences in support of a commoncause.

People don’t want to belong to impersonal national organizations anymore.They care about what happens in their hometowns and in their backyards. Inthe future successful organizations will emphasize their local work. Habitatfor Humanity is a nationwide operation, but to the volunteer pounding a nailinto a door jamb, it’s about that house he’s building and thatfamily who will be living in his neighborhood.

Local churches, especially those with denominational ties, must learn toemphasize their local nature. People don’t join denominations. Theyjoin local bodies of believers. Even global missions have local connections.Draw them for your congregation.

Create opportunities for relationships. You may win your members to a newBible study on the promise of an excellent learning experience, but theirlong-term motivation for attending will be the relationships they develop.Megachurches only survive because they encourage attenders to bond in smallgroups. Smaller churches will thrive if, they learn to nurture relationships.

Pastor and author Leith Anderson says in his church’s second constructionproject, they doubled the width of the hallways. That’s where peoplegathered to talk. The architect called them “extravagant corridors,” butthe church wanted to make relationships easier.

The customer’s rightOne hundred years ago, most shoes were sold in pairs, identical pairs, leftshoe and right shoe interchangable. Only after wearing them awhile did theshoes become molded to one foot or the other. Industrial improvements, drivenby the consumers’ growing desire for comfort, forced manufacturers toadjust their product.

The individualism of our time has given rise to consumerism, and the consumersare forcing change—even in the church.

Every pastor knows the feeling of being “shopped.” Visitors to churches arequite open about comparing their experience to a mental checklist ofexpectations. We asked new members of our congregation, “Why did you pickthis church?” Many said they liked the worship atmosphere or the servicesavailable for their children. No one said, “Because I’m committed tothis denomination.” The comfort factor drives the church member just as itdoes the consumer.

Retailers have discovered this. No longer are restrooms in the basem*nt orbehind closed doors marked “employees only.” They are just inside the frontdoor, where consumers want them. And they are large and luxurious just likeconsumers want them.

For churches, the lesson is about size and placement of restrooms, but muchmore. Today childcare is not a privilege but an entitlement. So the churchmust provide childcare at all church events.

Today worshipers want to attend on their timetables, so multiple serviceson multiple days are offered. The Saturday night service is as much forconvenience as anything.

Today consumers have an entertainment orientation, and whether we like itor not, pastors must acknowledge the influence of those expectations.

A church in my town promises visitors: “We won’t beat up on you, andwe won’t bore you.” They understand the mindset of the people they seekto reach. They have flourished without fanfare and without advertisem*nt.

The church of the future will take individuals and make of them communities,take consumers and make of them servants—a little more intentionally thanthe church of the past.

Lyle Schaller is a church consultant living in Naperville, Illinois.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

Learning the hard way

On Saturday afternoon I had gone to watch my son play baseball. When I returned my wife said in a panicky tone, “We’ve been trying to find you for an hour and a half. You were supposed to do a wedding this afternoon. Did you forget?”

My heart sank to my feet.

Immediately the rationalizations formed: it was a small wedding, the rehearsal took place several days before the ceremony, I had another wedding that day, it was on a Saturday—my usual day off. But the bottom line was, I forgot the most important event in the life of a couple in our church. There was no valid excuse.

I felt like such a loser. How could I have possibly made such a stupid mistake?

I learned that the wedding had been delayed for a few minutes and an associate minister had substituted for me so that the ceremony could proceed. But I knew I needed to apologize, so I quickly changed into a suit and drove an eternal 10 minutes to the church building, knowing the couple would probably be getting their pictures taken or maybe even be having their reception by now.

On the way, my carnal nature dreamed up a dozen lies: “I had a flat tire” … “I got stopped by a train” … “I had a vision of a 700-foot-high Jesus and was in a trance.” It was the longest, most sickening 10-minute drive of my life.

When I walked into the sanctuary, the couple was posing for pictures. When the bride saw me, she burst out, “Oh, Bob, I’m so glad you’re all right! We were afraid you were in an accident or something! What happened?”

I shook my head and muttered, “I’m sorry. I forgot. I have no excuse. I just blew it. I’m so sorry.”

To their credit, the bride and groom were gracious and forgiving. But I have never really forgiven myself. It’s still embarrassing.

But I learned from that mistake. Until that point, I had been handling my own calendar, making my own appointments, and scheduling all my own weddings and outside invitations. I realized my life had grown beyond my ability to administer on my own. The following Monday I had a long discussion with my secretary and totally surrendered my schedule to her discretion. She doesn’t overbook or overextend. She is able to say “no” better than I, and she leaves some margins in my life.

Now I don’t have two weddings on my day off. Now every Friday I am handed a piece of paper with the schedule of all the activities for the weekend and that schedule is posted in a prominent place in our home.

Though forgetting a wedding was about the worst thing a minister could do, it turned out to be a positive turning point for me. My life is more orderly, I have more free time, and I’ve not missed a wedding in 15 years!

—Robert Russell is minister at Southeast Christian Church2840 Hikes LaneLouisville KY 40218

Do you have a similar story of a mistake or gaffe that you’ve learned from? Send it to Learning the Hard Way, c/o LEADERSHIP, 465 Gundersen Dr., Carol Stream IL 60188, or contact us and we’ll pay $50-$100 (depending on length) for each story we’re able to publish.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

DISCIPLESHIP

When our kids were young, it was a big deal just to get them to wait their turn to speak in dinner conversations. When that happened we were pleased, but we still had a long way to go.

The conversations, though orderly, were a string of non sequiturs. Dan would go into excruciating detail telling us his dream of the night before. Joel would politely wait his turn to tell us, immediately afterward, that he had a yellow T-shirt in his closet. Andy would sit sucking his fingers, with a faraway look in his eyes, and when his turn came would grunt that he wanted a slingshot for his birthday.

Some group prayer meetings are like that. I’ve often found myself just taking my turn, along with the rest, to say to God the things I want to say, without much thought of what others are praying.

Good prayer conversation

Through my wife’s involvement in the Mom’s In Touch prayer movement, I have learned a method that we call “agree, vector, and build.” The method is to listen, really listen, to a person’s prayer, and to let it sink into my mind and heart before I move to my particular concerns.

Someone may pray for a family member’s health, for instance. As I mull over that prayer, I add a kind of “amen” to it, agreeing with it verbally or silently, thus entering more deeply into the concern.

Sometimes when I do that, I may find myself moved to add my own prayer, a nuance, to the prayer I heard. Others may do the same, vectoring their prayers and building on the original prayer. It is remarkable the ways we have experienced the leading of the Holy Spirit—not only in how to pray for a matter but in what to do about it after we have.

My friend Bob Bakke urges prayer groups to make their prayers short and many. Long, sonorous prayers by the “adept” stifle the participation of those who don’t feel so adept. So each should pray short prayers, many times in a session, thus leaving space for everyone to agree with, vector in, and build on the prayers of others. It can be a wonderful way to practice thesumphoneo the Lord commands.

Plan your spontaneity

Good corporate prayer in a large group also requires planning, at least as much as would go into any other well-planned service of worship. Many prayer meetings fail precisely at this point.

We often assume that a prayer meeting should simply “flow” spontaneously in the Spirit, meaning that there should be no planning, since planning would somehow hinder the flow. That’s not spontaneity. It’s what Thomas Howard calls “the myth of spontaneity.” Again, the “adept” dominate and the whole focus of the gathering sinks.

Our experience in other areas of life tells us that not much good comes from thoughtless spontaneity. Ask Mozart or Einstein if mere spontaneity had anything to do with their accomplishments, and they’ll say hard work, yes; discipline, yes; but mere spontaneity, no. Perhaps their insights came in a flash that was experienced as spontaneity, but that was built on years of hard work and training.

For that reason, I think all-church prayer meetings should be significant worship events, taking place perhaps only monthly, rather than weekly.

Become the lead pray-er

If a church is going to become a praying church, the pastor must take the lead as the most visible pray-er in the congregation. This leadership cannot be delegated to others, for the people of the church will regard as central what the leader leads, and as peripheral what he or she does not lead.

The pastor should announce to the church the time and the place that he is beginning to pray, invite all to come who will come, and begin to pray with whomever God gives. (No complaining over how few may come at first, only rejoicing over who did come!)

And keep at it until the kingdom comes. Quite literally.

—Ben Patterson

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

Video is no messiah

He lookedat me, this multimedia-user-friendly, nationally prominent,always-on-the-cutting-edge preacher and said, “You know, don’t you,that any church without a drop-down screen will be dead in a decade.”

What? In my mind I immediately began chiseling away the neogothic limestonefrom inside Duke Chapel in order to enable us to survive into the next decadewith video.

Look, I’m no Luddite. I’m writing this response to using videoin church (mentioned in LEADERSHIP’s last two issues,The Value of Video) on a computer.I go to movies. But really now, the gospel of Christ—having survived Nero,the Inquisition, Mao, the Total Woman, Benny Hinn, and my insipid sermons—willit survive technochurch? Multimedia praise, drop-down screens, TV technologymay be the death of us rather than our key to the future.

The virtue of visual media is that they tend to be engaging, stressing concreteimages rather than abstract ideas. But they do more than that. Video tendsto stress image over idea. It is the nature of TV to be fast-paced,not to linger, to constantly move from image to image.

Not long ago, I watched Bill Moyers’s PBS series Genesis. Moyersis intelligent and thoughtful. Furthermore, he assembled a studio full ofthoughtful, intelligent people to discuss passages in Genesis.

But the programs tended to be frustrating. What we got were sound bites,pieces of commentary by the individuals, little interaction, almost nodevelopment of ideas once the ideas were expressed. I thought, If Moyerscan’t pull off intelligent examination of material on TV, perhaps itjust can’t be done.

Video tends toward the superficial. It does a good job of giving the illusionof experience, of drawing the viewer into the story. But that’s aboutall.

When used in worship, video tends to re-form the worship (malform, I shouldsay). What ought to be participatory praise, people actively worshiping God,becomes a show watched by an audience. When a huge drop-down screen is usedin a worship setting, one gets the “King Kong Effect”—a gigantic talkinghead towering over a miniaturized congregation. Who’s being magnifiedhere?

Furthermore, multimedia in church runs the risk of playing into the handsof our other experiences with media.

A generation fed a steady diet of TV, with its barrage of advertisem*ntsand bamboozlements, develops a suspicion of TV. When people see a video image,they are conditioned to know that they are being treated mostly as consumers.The link between the televisual and consumerism is inextricable.

TV is intimate, yes, but down deep we know it is artificial intimacy, fabricatedby a medium that implies the talking head on the screen knows and cares aboutme. Furthermore, it is a distinctive quality of video to manage the viewer.It determines our point of view, our angle of vision. When the camera shootsup at an individual, the person is given god-like stature. Fast cuts makewhatever is shown appear exciting, dynamic. Background music determines audiencemood.

Admittedly, we preachers also manipulate when we speak. But we do not havevideo’s power to so exclusively determine the congregation’s pointof view and scope of vision.

So before you lobby the church board for that drop-down screen, think. Doyou really want to descend to that level? There’s a reason why JerrySpringer has done well on TV.

—William H. WillimonDuke University ChapelDurham, North Carolina

Moral Fences: Protect or Divide?

JamesMacDonald’s “5 Moral Fences”(Summer 1999) offered one pastor’sprescription for avoiding sexual temptation and leading a life above reproach.We invited your responses, and we got plenty! Here’s a sampling.

A hearty “Amen” to James MacDonald. In our urban ministry, I work with singlemoms and children and practice all of his principles, plus a couple more.I think Billy Graham’s practice of not eating lunch alone with a womanother than his wife should be added.

—Andy BalesDes Moines, Iowa

When I read the article, I had visions of the “bruised and bleeding” Phariseeswho walked around with eyes closed so they wouldn’t lust after womenthey’d possibly meet on their stroll downtown.

I’ve long suspected that limiting the role of women in the church couldwell have less to do with the stated theological reasons and more to do withmale leaders who find it easier to bar women from the inner circle of leadershipthan to deal straightforwardly with the personal problem of relating to womenas sex objects.

Women and men need to protect their moral integrity, but surely there’sa better way than building fences which all too often prevent men and womenfrom teaming together to do fruitful ministry.

—Pamela HeimColorado Springs, Colorado

I too have set several “thick hedges and high fences” against moral failure.

I recently offended a woman who was making flirtatious remarks and gesturestoward me. I confronted her and told her to stop it. I did the same thingseveral years ago with a young lady in the church who gave everyone (menand women) full-body hugs. She didn’t have bad intentions, but I stoppedit because I know my heart. As a final step (in both cases), I made the incidentknown to my wife as soon as we could be alone to discuss it.

—Timothy MillsWhitton, Arkansas

I agree with all five “fences,” but I would have added another: Pray forstrength, because you need supernatural support for a supernatural attack.Alexander Solshenitsyn said it best: “the line between good and evil … occilates within the human heart, and even the most rational approach toethics is defenseless unless there is the will to do what is right.” Fencesare practical and needed, but without the power of the Holy Spirit they areincomplete.

—Ross RamseyRamrossj@aol.com

To expand on MacDonald’s experience, I have invited my wife into mymind, and especially my computer. She knows how to access every Web pagethat I have ever hit. I’ve invited her to see where I’ve been,in order to limit where I go.

—Mark MatsonSalt Lake City, Utah

MacDonald’s article reflects a paranoia, of which we must rid ourselvesor face increasingly isolated and mistrusting relationships between clergyand laity.

I have a “no fence” solution to MacDonald’s concerns:Don’t!

Alone with a person of the opposite sex? Feeling tempted to misbehave?Don’t!

Alone in a hotel room? Feeling tempted to do something you’ll regret?Don’t!

This is not rocket science. Life is filled with temptations; we can’tavoid them, but we don’t have to give in to them, either (see Matt.4:1-11 and James 4:7, for starters).

Were I searching for a church home, I would likely walk away from a congregationwhose pastor did not have the moral and ethical strength to be alone witha person of the opposite sex without serious temptation. If a pastor can’ttrust himself alone with a person who happens to be a woman, why should Ihave any great confidence that I can trust him with me?

If a pastor isn’t sure he or she can resist moral failure without artificialfences, then the problem is not the ambient temptations; it’s thepastor’s moral and ethical integrity.

We’ve been called by God to love people where we find them. How canwe do that if we’re not willing to join them, except when behind ourfences?

—Bill ColeyEast Moline, Illinois

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

FUTURAMA

Leaders Need New Focus for NewMillenniumFuturist says put past behind you.

Joel Barker’slessons for next century leaders:

1. Focus the majority of your efforts on the future. Followers areconcerned about the present, but a leader’s primary responsibility isto find, recognize, and secure the future. A leader is someone you chooseto follow to a place you wouldn’t go by yourself.

2. Understand the nature of fundamental change. New paradigms showup before you need them; outsiders are vital. New rules are usually formulatedby someone not part of the present, successful paradigm.

3. Appreciate complex systems and how they work. The smallest actionscan cause tremendous differences over a long period of time. Anticipate whateven tinkering will do.

4. Examine your leadership style to see how it affects productivity.Two leader types, charismatic and bully, are determined by positive or negativeuse of control and stress and by the measure of their followers’satisfaction. Followers of positive leaders are up to twenty times moreeffective. No matter how you measure it—making money, saving souls, educatingchildren, or protecting a nation—your leadership style affects yourgroup’s productivity.

5. Create shared vision to build bridges to the future. People nowexpect to have a voice in their future. Leading is about teams. Leaders buildbridges and encourage followers to join them on the journey across.

—from Leadershift: Five Lessons for Leaders in the 21st Century.(Star Thrower, 800-727-2344)

• Photocopy bulletins for Jan. 1, 8, 15.
• Move candlelight Christmas Eve service to New Year’s Eve.
• Get out a big large print pulpit Bible
• Test projecting overheads by flashlight.
• Retrieve flannelgraph from attic.
• Practice booming Spurgeon voice.
• Buy acoustic guitar, rewrite words to “Silent Night” for extended use.
• Stockpile canned sermons

MIXED MEDIA

“And after sports, tonight’s prayer … “Pastors’ appearances during nightly news make news.

The manager ofa Meridian, Mississippi, television outlet didn’t know the reactionhe would cause when he invited local ministers to pray during the late nightnewscast. Callers to a daily poll had repeatedly said that the return ofprayer to schools was needed in light of recent attacks by students. Thestation’s response: we can’t put prayer in schools, but we canput it on TV.

WMDN/WGBM general manager Marc Grossman asked pastors to take the final 90seconds of his newscast to offer a prayer or devotion, replacing the usuallight bit about waterskiing squirrels and such. The segment is called “Keepthe Faith.” Most pastors intercede for local and national leaders.

Danny Chisholm, pastor of Central Baptist Church, taped two appearances.“It’s been good for our city,” Chisholm said. “We need some balanceto the disturbing news we see. And it’s a nice way to sign off the day.”

ABC reported Grossman’s unusual programing move on its own evening newscast.Other broadcasters were not so delighted. Barbara Walters, on her gabfest“The View,” criticized the station’s mixing of news and religion.

The community, however, seems to love it. “Not one single viewer has complained,”the station’s receptionist said. “I get positive calls every day.We’re gonna keep doing it.”

We askedpastors: How many books of any kind have you read in the past three months?

• None/no response 2%
• One 3%
• Two to four 38%
• five to seven 32%
• eight to ten 10%
• more than ten 15%

OR MAGAZINES?

Whatperiodicals do you regularly read or scan (other thanLEADERSHIP?)

• CHRISTIANITY TODAY 32%
• Local newspaper16%
• Time 13%
• Discipleship Journal (tie) 13%
• Newsweek 12%
• Reader’s Digest (tie)12%

(source: 1999 LEADERSHIP survey)

If Mama Won’t Come to the Mountain … Take Her a Videotape

Help reaching the parents.

But we couldn’t reach their parents—until we learned how to get into theirhomes. We videotaped a club meeting. All the children were singing and playing games.We made sure to focus in on the children from unchurched families. The messagefor that session was a clear, simple explanation of the gospel using visualaids and showing the attentiveness of the children. The edited tape ran 15minutes.

Then we called the parents and offered to stop by their homes and show themthe tape. Most accepted. Even the more reluctant parents were glad to seetheir kids having fun.

One child’s father ignored the tape at first, reading the newspaperinstead. When the mother oooed and ahhhed, he peeked over the paper. Aftera few minutes he laid it aside and watched with pride as his son won an awardfor Scripture memorization. He even watched through the gospel presentation.

Several families visited the church as result of our video and allowed theirchildren to start attending Sunday school as well.

—Tim and Joann HogansonSalvador, Bahai Brazil

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

I’d Give that Church 5 Stars

Pay a stranger to grade your church. You need to know what they think.

People have always had a shopping mentality when seekinga place of worship, but today they are more up front about it.Most people decide after one visit whether they will return. If they likewhat they see and feel, they come back. If they return a third time, thereis a 90 percent chance they’ll stay, at least for a while.

Because so many decisions are made on first impressions, we need to harvestfeedback from those who shop us. Here’s how to implement a secret-shopperprogram at your church:

1. Discuss the secret shopper idea with appropriate people. Help themunderstand the need. Request finances to recruit and train a shopper. (Paythe shopper $25 to $75. Schedule one per quarter.)

2. Contact potential shoppers. The person being considered shouldnot be part of the church, but should understand the community demographics.(Recruit from your target group. If you want to reach young people, hirea young person; if Hispanics, then a Hispanic.)

3. Provide training insights for the shopper. The shopper should observea normal Sunday service unless another area needs evaluation. (And tell theshopper what you’d really like to hear about.)

4. Ask the shopper to attend a service. (Afterward the shopper gradesthe experience on a form you provide.)

5. Meet with the ministry team within a week of the visit to reviewwritten and verbal feedback of the shopper’s experience.

6. Use the information to enhance ministries, instruct people, andbuild the team. Avoid embarrassing people.

7. Follow up on all changes discussed and implemented. You may wantto schedule a follow-up visit from your shopper.

—Stan Toler and Alan NelsonThe Five Star Church(Regal Books, 1999)

A Welcome that Melts in Your Mouth

(And probably in your hands, too.)

Why not Chock Full o’Nuts?

We have struggled with what to give our first-time guests as an incentiveto complete the information card. We tried books and tapes—all kinds ofthings. People still seemed hesitant to register their attendance or stopby our information booth.

But recently we landed on an idea that removes the tension and works incrediblywell. During our announcement time, we say that the church has made an officialproclamation: we have made the 100 Grand candy bar (made by Nestle) the officialcandy bar of our church. Then we tell our visitors that they are worth ahundred grand to us and to God. We ask them to fill out the card and stopby the booth to swap it for a 100 Grand. And they do!

This gift is inexpensive and, more important, it makes our guests feelappreciated.

—J. Paul CovertPalm Valley Christian ChurchPhoenix, Arizona

Mugs and Kisses

Our “thank you” to Sunday visitors turned into a great outreach to our community.About four years ago, we started delivering to our guests a special coffeecup. We visit their homes within a week of their attendance. The mug, bearinga church logo, is filled with Hershey’s Kisses.

Nobody has ever fled our “mugging.” In fact, the guests liked the gift sowell, we took to the streets. We have passed out mugs to customers at a nearbygrocery store, a neighborhood gas station, and a small shopping center. Weadd a note that says, “This is a free gift just to let you know that Godloves you!”

Many of those we mug later visit the church.

—Ricky SanchezButler Mennonite Brethren ChurchFresno, California

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

Ministry in the mid-seventeenth century was tough, particularly if you were an Anglican priest.

The Cromwellian revolution, having toppled the reign of Charles I, proceeded to divest the monarchy of its power and influence. Since the king was the head of the state church, Anglicanism got caught in the fury of the overthrow.

In the midst of this turmoil, a tribute was written to the local pastor ofthe Harold Church in the village of Staunton, England. It remains today onthe wall of the church and reads, “In the year 1653, when all things sacredwere throughout the nation destroyed or profaned, this church was built tothe glory of God by Sir Robert Shirley whose singular praise it was to havedone the best of things in the worst of times.”

As bad as our times may seem, they are not the worst of times. Noone is throwing us to lions or burning us on lampposts. But these are challengingdays for those committed to engaging this culture with the claims of Christ.If we want it said of us that we have done the “best of things” in our times,we must understand the nature of these times and know what to do.

In the larger picture, only one thing has changed: God has been moved frompublic prominence to the privacy of an individual’s conscience. Thismarginalization of the Divine has left our culture void of a moral centerand, as Francis Schaeffer said, with no “true truth” to provide the basisfor consensus and moral authority.

With God out of view, relativism and pluralism filled the void and thereare no longer absolutes to guide and define behavior. In his analysis ofthis new world without limits, Carl Henry observes, “Our generation is lostto the truth of God, to the reality of divine revelation, to the contentof God’s will, to the power of his redemption, and to the authorityof His Word. For this loss it is paying dearly in a swift relapse to paganism.The savages are stirring again; you can hear them rumbling and rustling inthe tempo of our times” (Twilight of a Great Civilization: The Drift TowardNeopaganism, p. 20).

We could try to ignore the shift if it weren’t so threatening to thechurch. Throughout history one of Satan’s successful ploys has beento enculturate God’s people. It was often the undoing of Israel andprovided grounds for God’s censure of the Corinthian and Laodicean churches.When the church becomes little more than an echo of the values of a fallensociety, it loses the distinctiveness that gives it power (1 Peter 2:12).In the terms of John 17, we have been called out of this world to go backin with the claims of Christ.

A menu of seductions“Viva la difference” must be the church’s rally cry. Our challenge isto lead and teach in such a way that our distinctives are evident, balanced,and biblical.

To live out the critical difference between the church and the world demandsthat we understand our culture and that we can articulate the essentialsof living Christianly in pagan times. We must strive for the honor creditedto the men of Issachar: that they understood their times and knew what todo (1 Chron. 12:32).

While understanding our times, it is important that we don’t cower beforethe culture. We are not victims of our times. Our times only offer a menuof seductions. Compelling as they are, we are still people of choice.

Equal caution must be taken that we don’t paint all of culture as darkand dangerous. By God’s amazing grace, aspects of our fallen world stillenrich and inspire the mind and heart. Music, literature, and other artsare often beautiful expressions of the creative richness of the image ofGod within mankind.

Given these cautions, what can we do to understand our times and protectand propel our ministries toward the best of things?

Develop a Christ-centered worldview. Read those gifted in discerning culturaltrends in the light of biblical truth, such as Gene Vieth on postmodernism,Ravi Zacharias, D.A. Carson, and from the last generation, Francis Schaeffer.Becoming a student of generational nuances is equally important as we seekto empower builders, boomers, busters, etc., to get past their own worldsand get a grip on Kingdom living.

But the most effective tool in discerning our times is understanding whatScripture teaches us about the fallenness of our world and the clear standardsof scriptural righteousness by which we then measure all we observe, experience,and do.

Spin doctorsDiscernment begins by watching our world with healthy skepticism. Our environmentis severely damaged by sin. John calls it the cosmos and picturesit as being managed by Satan, the “ruler of this world” (John 12:31, 16:11).Christ told the Pharisees that when Satan is in charge, you can expect bothdeceit and death to prevail because he was a murderer from the beginningand there is no truth in him (John 8:44).

As students of fallen times, we become aware that much of what we hear trumpetedas good and right may very well be wrong, regardless how wonderful the spinmay be. We’re aware that the end game of the ruler is to create anenvironment where death is promoted and affirmed. Healthy skepticism isundergirded by the biblical warnings that there is a way that seems right,but its end is the way of death. From God’s point of view, “My thoughtsare not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways” (Prov. 14:12, Isa.55:8).

Skepticism is not enough, however. If all we have is applied suspicion, weare likely to spend our lives looking for opportunities to curse the darkness.But we are called to do more. We are called to understand the darkness ina way that enables us to let the light of Christ shine through us into thedeepest darkness of the ruler’s night (Matt. 5:14-16).

Understanding the darkness means we recognize that our fallen world isfundamentally driven and defined not by sinful activity but by non-truthvalues that produce the wayward behavior. The believers in the Colossianchurch who had been “delivered from the domain of darkness into the kingdomof His beloved Son” were warned by Paul not to be taken captive by “thetraditions of men according to the elementary principles of this world” (Col.1:13, 2:8). The elementary principles are the false notions of the ruler—theunderlying values that shape the thought and behavior of the cosmos.

Our task, then, is to resist the temptation to simply bemoan deviant behaviorand instead identify the values that Satan uses to manage his system andcaptivate souls. Then after isolating the invalid values, identify thecontrasting kingdom values that lead individuals from darkness to light.

In a pluralistic society, for instance, where everyone is entitled to hisown truth claims and behavioral preferences, tolerance becomes the leadingvalue. But measuring unconditional tolerance against Scripture invalidatesits claim on life and liberty.

God’s Word teaches that in his grace and mercy God is not only willingto tolerate the sinner but to pursue him for His glory. Yet in the process,God cannot sacrifice His righteousness by tolerantly affirming the sin. SinceHe is true, then inevitably there are some things that are right and othersthat are wrong. His followers live to reflect the worth of the sinner andthe weight of the sin in clear, yet compassionate ways.

Another unviable value in today’s world is living to bring selfish pleasureto ourselves. God, by contrast, has taught us that true personal pleasurecomes not by living to please ourselves, but rather from living to pleaseGod and others. In a society that is driven by greed and personal gain, Godcalls us to the priority of generosity and sacrifice. In a world that valuesself as the center of existence, God advances the value of servanthood. Ina world of unrestrained sensual pursuit, Scripture calls us to self-control.

The discerner’s secretDiscerning our times grows not as much from the study of our culture, asimportant as that is, as from a deepening understanding of God. Getting agrip on him—the values that emanate from his character, his teaching aboutwhat is true, and his warnings about the schemes of our adversary—will makeus insightful students of our times.

And as the values of the kingdom become the expression of our lifestyle,we’ll catch the attention of a deceived and dying world.

Douglas Coupland, author of the best-selling work Life After God,makes a startling confession: “Now here is my secret: I tell it to you withan openness of heart that I doubt I shall ever achieve again, so I pray thatyou are in a quiet room as you hear these words. My secret is that I needGod—that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help megive, because I no longer seem to be capable of giving; to help me be kind,as I no longer seem capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem beyondbeing able to love” (p. 359).

His plea mirrors the hollow despair that this fallen world produces.Today’s task for Christians is to demonstrate the wonderful differenceso that the Couplands of this world might find the hope that only Christcan give.

Joe Stowell, heard daily on the radio program, “Proclaim,”is president of Moody Bible Institute820 N. LaSalleChicago IL 60610

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

New resources to develop your ministry

What does a New England Presbyterian pastor have in common with a Four Square pastor from Hawaii? Both are passionate about building teams in church.

George Cladis and Wayne Cordeiro have written two very different books about teamwork. For starters, Pastor Cordeiro pictures an ideal team as a canoe full of Hawaiians paddling in unison over a still, tropical sea. Pastor Cladis finds an ideal team in a painting of the Trinity that is almost 600 years old.

They apparently wrote for different audiences. Wayne Cordeiro wroteDoing Church as a Team (New Hope Publishing, 1998) to convince lay persons to join a team at church. I assume this because he starts with the basics of salvation, “every member a minister,” and the uniqueness of each person, which most pastors already have in the bag. In Leading the Team-Based Church (Jossey-Bass, 1999), George Cladis shoots directly to persuade pastors and church staffs to build leadership teams.

Like most books on leadership, both make much of vision. They also agree that it is even more important in church than in other environments to align the teams around the vision. A vision must be much more than a slogan on letterhead if the pastor is going to build effective teams. A healthy environment, created by living the vision, provides fertile soil for growing teams.

Doing Church as a Team is easy to read and benefits from Cordeiro’s stories and colorful illustrations. The inspiration necessary to build teams in church comes from the direct call and gifting of God upon the life of each person. Pastor Cordeiro outlines his “DESIGN” course, a spiritual gifts inventory (available online atwww.newhope-hawaii.org) that they use to place each person in a ministry team. He rightly insists each person must develop a servant spirit: “Being committed to one another’s success is irreducible in doing church as a team.”

Two practical take-aways from Cordiero’s book will help me build teams in my church. First, he suggests “shadowing” as a leadership development tool. By that he means an apprentice simply follows someone else around while they minister. Shadowing, he maintains, is a low-threat, high-return means of equipping team leaders.

The second practical tool is “fractal team building.” A fractal pattern is a shape that is repeated over and over in varying sizes throughout a design. Fractal team building provides a simple structure. He develops it this way: First, divide the job in four parts. Second, find a team member for each part. There, now you have a team and you are the team leader. Each of them can repeat that pattern as their new ministry grows. This structure is elegant in its simplicity and good advice for me. I tend to break my job down into 30 parts and then despair of ever getting any help with it.

Cladis, meanwhile, spans the gulf between theology and business theory to promote team-building as a key agenda item for pastoral leadership. He beginsLeading the Team Based-Church with a theological discussion of community within the Trinity. The person of the Triune God truly may be the place to begin talking about teams, but I found his treatment of it distracting. He depends heavily on a word I’d never heard before, “perichoretic.”

It means “circle dance,” and he takes a whole chapter, “The Dance of Leadership,” just to explain it. He also refers repeatedly to Rublev’s icon of the Trinity, a work of art from the fifteenth century that was way off my radar screen.

Nonetheless, his starting point is compelling and provides ballast for what otherwise might be a trendy topic. He seesaws between Trinity and current business research to balance two rationales for building teams. I found myself sharing his fascination with the connection between the two.

Cladis structures the book around seven essential characteristics of successful teams: covenants, vision, culture, collaboration, trust, empowerment, and learning. While these qualities may be important in other leadership areas, together they are the core of what it means to build teams.

Throughout the book he chronicles what team development might look like in fictional Apple Hill Church.

Normally, I find this kind of hypothetical meandering to be contrived, but I actually learned more from Apple Hill Church than from the rest of the book. With this example he effectively communicates the differences between a traditional church and a team-based model, and it illustrates the transition process.

His advice is born from his own leadership struggles in a growing church. Consequently, Cladis advocates that church leaders build their teams with church staff first, then work out to the rest of the congregation. The development of a staff leadership team is the number one priority presented in this book. The leadership must model teamwork for the rest of the church.

He insists that harmony around philosophy of ministry, not theology or personality or gifting, is the most important element in creating a strong staff team.

Cladis sees the present age as providing a unique team-building opportunity for the church. He asserts that “the postmodern world wants to know the heart of leadership,” maintaining that significant spiritual impact will occur when the postmodern world sees the gospel lived out in community in a local church. In other words (Jesus’), “By this will all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

So, how will these books affect teams in my church? On one hand, I am freed of the fear of teams. Reading these books concurrently made me realize that just because I have a church that calls ministry groups “committees” doesn’t mean that “team” is a foreign concept. Most of the things we do will require only small adjustments to make them into more effective teams. The basic ingredients are already in place.

Both books confronted a hidden pride in my own heart that causes me to resist building teams. The basic reason I need to work in a team is that I don’t have all the gifts, all the passions, or all the insight necessary to carry out God’s ministry. I’d rather not admit that. Too many, myself included, are content to accomplish a lot less in exchange for maintaining a little more control. Teams are the remedy for my heart problem and my productivity problem.

On the other hand, I’m not immediately going to tell my people, “You’ve got to stop doing things the way you’re doing them and work in teams.”

Cladis offered one sentence I’ve thought more about than any other in either book. It is a good word for those who are open to God’s will regarding teams, but are cautious about jumping on a trendy bandwagon: “The [children of Israel] did not follow Moses because they thought he had a good idea … they followed him because they sensed that God truly sent him.”

If you want to implement team ministry, be certain that God has called you to do it in your church and that your people know it.

—Scott ReavelyWest Linn Baptist ChurchP.O. Box 5West Linn OR 97068

To order books reviewed in LEADERSHIP, call 1-800-266-5766, dept. 1250.

Team Building as a Spiritual Exercise

In their own words.

Just like paddling a canoe, God designed us to stroke together. Each of us has been given a “paddle” by God. A gift. A calling. And like the paddlers of a canoe, each of us has a place or a role to fill … He fits us alongside others who have a similar assignment and calls us a family, a team, the Church. No one person is meant to carry this assignment alone. It wasn’t designed that way. We were created to do church as a team!

—Wayne Cordiero

Moving chairs around and renaming committees “teams” is not enough. Team building has to become a spiritual discipline for the principal leadership team. The individuals on the team have to want it, believe in it, and live it. Furthermore, they have to model it.

—George Cladis

NEW SOFTWARE

The Power of Babble

Scripture in many languages highlights new releases.

Reviewed by Tim Ostermiller, contributing editor, CHRISTIANITY ONLINE magazine.

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal. Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

Pastors and keyleaders scratch their heads and wonder, How will I motivate mycongregation? In the coming decade, the motivations of compassion andcommunity will stir the grassroots to action and generosity.

However, pastors and leaders who continue to approach the congregation withthe motivations of challenge, reasonability, and commitment will be disappointed.They will simply see an increasing motivational gap between themselves andthe grassroots.

In meeting after meeting, leaders say to one another, “If people were onlymore committed … ” “If they would just rise to the challenge … “

The leaders are broadcasting on the frequencies of challenge and commitment,but few in the grassroots are tuned in. The appeal goes unheard, so the samefew people end up receptive and responding year after year. Most people todayare tuned elsewhere: to compassion and community.

You’ve lost that lovin’ feelin’While all five motivations on my list are at work, in most people two willdominate. The key in the next decade is which two to employ.

I ask the people I counsel to share what made their congregation attractiveyears earlier. I often hear how they felt at home and discovered “family”there. But over time, weighed down keeping the venture afloat, they’vegrown more concerned about commitment than community

Commitment remains on my list because of its profound effect on people. Itis, however, last on the list. Commitment is the motivation that most peopledevelop later in their Christian pilgrimage.

If there were lots of long-time Christians out there to reach, we would dowell to preach commitment. But what’s out there are people who do notknow Christ. Their ears do not hear our exhortation to dedication.

Today, with extended family scattered, their longings for community havebecome desperately and profoundly urgent. They want to hear about belongingand caring. Discovering these, they will become involved and eventuallycommitted.

Love in any language“Our church had been dying for years,” one elderly woman told me after asecond visit to one of my seminars. “We were down to 14 people, in our seventiesand eighties. We knew it wouldn’t be long before our church was dead,done, and gone.”

Apparently there was much discussion after I invited them to a theology ofservice rather than survival.

High-compassion, high-community congregations will thrive in coming years.

“We heard what you said,” the woman told me, “and we decided we’d bettertry to help somebody while we still had a little time.

“We went to the elementary school near our church and said to the principal,‘We’d like to do something worthwhile to help the kids here beforeour church dies.’

“The principal said to us, ‘Oh, I thought your church died years ago.’

“In a way it had,” the old woman concluded, “but things have changed.”

This handful of senior citizens got busy in their community. If you go tothat church today you will find 90 people in worship. Their compassion wascontagious—and attractive.

We have had in recent years a focus on program-driven churches, purpose-drivenchurches, and vision-driven churches. They talk the language of commitment.But when you look behind the scenes, you see those churches work becausesomebody is delivering the compassion and community.

Increasingly, unchurched people will be drawn to churches that care.High-compassion, high-community congregations will thrive in the coming years.

Falling in love againJesus does not say to Peter, “Will you make the commitment?” His final questionis not “Will you rise to the challenge?”

Christ says, “Peter, do you love me?”

“Yes, Lord.”

“Then feed my sheep.”

Jesus appeals to compassion and community. So, too, must today’s leader.

The phrase “Mary, will you be willing to teach third grade Sunday schoolnext year?” is an invitation to commitment. Mary may do her duty, take herturn, but she will likely never fall in love with her class.

You can say, “Mary, we invite you to fall in love with this group of kidsand give them the privilege of falling in love with you.” She is more likelyto rise to the opportunity.

I encourage leaders to find a one-time mission project they would enjoy andinvolve significant groups from the church—youth, senior adults, and such.I am amazed at how many people, in the midst of a communal effort, rediscovercompassion.

In fundraising, leaders typically plan campaigns with commitment cards, loyaltySundays, and challenge goals. That is regrettable. Research shows that appealworks well among leaders’ households, but it fizzles among the grassroots.When the campaign is built on compassion, it resonates among the membershipand they give as generously as the leaders.

The commitment card can become a compassion card. After all, real stewardshipis compassion. The card could say, “We are grateful for the generosity ofGod’s gifts in our lives.

Out of that spirit of generosity, we look forward to giving x-amount to serveGod’s mission in the coming year.” Givers today want to see how theirofferings will help somebody.

The pastor’s task is to connect with his leaders on the basis of compassionand community, then together to motivate the congregation with this samespirit.

Kennon L. Callahan is a consultant, author, speaker, and pastor.305 Spring Creek Village, Dallas TX 75248

Copyright © 1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.